Haddow Press Experiment

Television Showdown Index

Archived in Television, Entertainment, Reviews |

Television Showdown on Haddow Drive

I’m all into the feature columns so I’ve been fiddling with some ideas around a “television showdown” where I pit two similar shows against each other on a variety of standard criteria. The criteria are always the same, and the winner of each criterion gets one point, for a maximum of five points. Winner takes all.

The Criteria

• Criterion 1: Glad-I’m-Not-Them Factor — This may seem like a backwards factor, but generally I enjoy shows that show me something, somewhere, or someone I’d rather avoid doing or being.
• Criterion 2: Use of Revenue Generating Product Placement — Score one for selling out to the man! By the way: Drink Slurm. Soylent Green is People.
• Criterion 3: Inclusion of Primates in Cast — Because monkeys always make everything funnier. (As long as they are well treated, well fed, and allowed to sexually dominate the B-list actors.)
• Criterion 4: Clear and Present Reference to Adult Situations — Kids shows are for kids. Simple.
• Criterion 5: Gratuitous Use of Four Letter Explicatives — Only because the degeneration of the English language through the exponential increase in four-letter adjectives is very, very sad.

As Showdowns occur, they will be listed here. Stay tuned for updates!

• Episode #1 : The Office (UK) versus The Office (USA)
• Episode #2 : The Amazing Race versus Survivor
• Episode #3 : Family Guy versus The Simpsons
• Episode #4 : Law and Order versus CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
• Episode #5 : Lost versus Gilligan’s Island
• Episode #6 : Battlestar Galactica (Remake) versus Battlestar Galactica (Original)

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